My day was one of surprises- four, to be exact- and all revolving around that powerful thing we call the Internet.
Surprises
"Hey, I saw 'Jack' on the Internet today!" So began my workday this morning, as my friend informed me that he had seen a picture of my son on reddit, one of the most popular websites in the world (#67 globally, #27 in the USA, according to Alexa). I was shocked; how did that happen? I went to the site, found the image, and saw that it was a picture I had posted on facebook last night; it had been re-posted on reddit. That was the first surprise of the day.
The second was just how popular the photo was. Over 150,000 people had viewed it. And it had been up for only a few hours (no more than twelve). It was amusing- which is why I had posted it in the first place- and apparently, thousands of other people agreed. (As an aside, it's a picture of Jack laying down, legs crossed, reading a book, while waiting for me to change his diaper. His pose looks like a middle-age man waiting for a bus). It was popular on facebook, and apparently popular on the "big" Internet. Okay, two surprises down. The third was to follow.
The third deals with comments. After looking at the image, I noticed the comments- 243 of them, to be exact- about the picture. I expected them to be in the same vein as those it got on facebook ("that's funny," "how cute," "I wish my child would sit so still," etc). No. I was taken aback by the variety- and nature- of the comments. Some direct quotes (profanity warning):
"This kid seems full of shit to me."
"If this kid can read, he can use the toilet."
"he is definitely at least 2yrs old. I was potty trained as soon as I started walking."
"He is, the most interesting toddler in the world. Stay poopy, my friends."
"How old is he, 8?"
"He is displaying symptoms of Gingervitis."
"Tell your aunt/uncle to stop being shitty parents and force that lazy little shit to use the toilet."
"Wait, the kid knows how to read but doesn't know how to not shit his pants. Your aunt and uncle might want to sort their priorities out a bit."
"kids gotta massive head"
etc. etc. etc.
Some comments were reasonable, some were intended to be funny, but in general, the comments were along the lines of "this kid is too old for diapers" and "the parents are fools." The theme was judgment: I was being reviled for my parenting skills . . . which people were basing off a photo to which they had no back-story. And, as an aside, many assumed my son was 2 or older; he's 18 months. Fascinating.
The fourth and final surprise deals with propagation. They call it "going viral" for a reason. Shortly after we saw the photo, we posted a plea on facebook to have it removed. We soon determined who did it and that person removed it quickly, but it was too late. Many other sites had the photo at that point. Don't believe me? Google "cousin awaits diaper change" and see for yourself. Searching google for this exact image yields 95 results. 95 people have re-posted it. And just think where it will go from there. It has 2428 "likes" on memeguy.com- how many of those people have sent it along? Yes, it's gone viral. My son is more famous than I (or this blog) will ever be.
Reflections
Now, first things first. The good thing is there was no damage done. My son's name was not revealed, and our location and other personal information is safe. That's a blessing, and really the most important thing of all. The second thing: WOW did we learn some lessons today, and valuable lessons learned at minimal cost are worth sharing. Here they are:
1) Be careful what you post
Once it's out, it's out. If you post it on facebook, you may well be posting it to the world. I confess, I wonder if my son will stumble across his picture 20 years from now, randomly posted on some unknown site. He well may.
In the news recently, people have been all spun up about privacy, and their desire for it. I wonder how many of those same people broadcast their lives themselves all over facebook, twitter, or wherever. Face it, people: we don't want privacy. We say we do, but our actions speak differently. We want people to know, and we want lots of them to know- that's why you probably have facebook friends you don't really know (or even like); you want people to see you.
2) Once it's out, it's totally out
The person who posted the picture did the right thing, and deleted the image right away. Still, it doesn't really affect much. It's been posted and re-posted so many times that we'll never track them all down. The Internet is unstoppable- it's too big, fast, and powerful for any one of us. It's a virus. Don't think that snuffing out an initial snafu means that you're out of the woods; you'll never be. So don't make the mistake in the first place.
3) People are impressively ignorant and judgmental
Okay; I knew this one already. But it hits home when you see them talking about YOU, and YOUR CHILD, in disparaging ways, without even knowing the situation or background.
I posted the picture on facebook for friends and family. Here's the background to it: for months, when Jack needs a new diaper, I've put him down on the changing table and given him a book because he likes to look at the pictures- it keeps him from thrashing around while I'm changing him. In just the last few days, he's started crossing his leg before I change him, assuming "old man" pose, which I just find hilarious. That's the picture I took, and why. But here's how people took it- people who don't know me from Adam: they assumed my son got himself up there, picked out a book, was fully literate, and sat there reading for minutes while I did other chores. Their guesses on his age were mostly off, and in some cases, hilarious. But that didn't stop them from pronouncing, with certainty, that he was "too old for diapers." Impressive, the knowledge they can (supposedly) gleam from a picture. Equally impressive that most people, rather than enjoying it for the humor it was intended to produce, turned it into a judgmental situation.
Our human hearts are extremely dark, and nowhere is that better displayed than the Internet. We're inherently self-centered, and that often manifests itself in judging others. "You're stupid; here's why." "I'm superior, because I don't do ______." How often do we do this? How often do I? I'll definitely think twice in the future . . .
Right. I'm off to post compromising photos of myself. Couldn't possibly hurt.
Surprises
"Hey, I saw 'Jack' on the Internet today!" So began my workday this morning, as my friend informed me that he had seen a picture of my son on reddit, one of the most popular websites in the world (#67 globally, #27 in the USA, according to Alexa). I was shocked; how did that happen? I went to the site, found the image, and saw that it was a picture I had posted on facebook last night; it had been re-posted on reddit. That was the first surprise of the day.
The second was just how popular the photo was. Over 150,000 people had viewed it. And it had been up for only a few hours (no more than twelve). It was amusing- which is why I had posted it in the first place- and apparently, thousands of other people agreed. (As an aside, it's a picture of Jack laying down, legs crossed, reading a book, while waiting for me to change his diaper. His pose looks like a middle-age man waiting for a bus). It was popular on facebook, and apparently popular on the "big" Internet. Okay, two surprises down. The third was to follow.
The third deals with comments. After looking at the image, I noticed the comments- 243 of them, to be exact- about the picture. I expected them to be in the same vein as those it got on facebook ("that's funny," "how cute," "I wish my child would sit so still," etc). No. I was taken aback by the variety- and nature- of the comments. Some direct quotes (profanity warning):
"This kid seems full of shit to me."
"If this kid can read, he can use the toilet."
"he is definitely at least 2yrs old. I was potty trained as soon as I started walking."
"He is, the most interesting toddler in the world. Stay poopy, my friends."
"How old is he, 8?"
"He is displaying symptoms of Gingervitis."
"Tell your aunt/uncle to stop being shitty parents and force that lazy little shit to use the toilet."
"Wait, the kid knows how to read but doesn't know how to not shit his pants. Your aunt and uncle might want to sort their priorities out a bit."
"kids gotta massive head"
etc. etc. etc.
Some comments were reasonable, some were intended to be funny, but in general, the comments were along the lines of "this kid is too old for diapers" and "the parents are fools." The theme was judgment: I was being reviled for my parenting skills . . . which people were basing off a photo to which they had no back-story. And, as an aside, many assumed my son was 2 or older; he's 18 months. Fascinating.
The fourth and final surprise deals with propagation. They call it "going viral" for a reason. Shortly after we saw the photo, we posted a plea on facebook to have it removed. We soon determined who did it and that person removed it quickly, but it was too late. Many other sites had the photo at that point. Don't believe me? Google "cousin awaits diaper change" and see for yourself. Searching google for this exact image yields 95 results. 95 people have re-posted it. And just think where it will go from there. It has 2428 "likes" on memeguy.com- how many of those people have sent it along? Yes, it's gone viral. My son is more famous than I (or this blog) will ever be.
Reflections
Now, first things first. The good thing is there was no damage done. My son's name was not revealed, and our location and other personal information is safe. That's a blessing, and really the most important thing of all. The second thing: WOW did we learn some lessons today, and valuable lessons learned at minimal cost are worth sharing. Here they are:
1) Be careful what you post
Once it's out, it's out. If you post it on facebook, you may well be posting it to the world. I confess, I wonder if my son will stumble across his picture 20 years from now, randomly posted on some unknown site. He well may.
In the news recently, people have been all spun up about privacy, and their desire for it. I wonder how many of those same people broadcast their lives themselves all over facebook, twitter, or wherever. Face it, people: we don't want privacy. We say we do, but our actions speak differently. We want people to know, and we want lots of them to know- that's why you probably have facebook friends you don't really know (or even like); you want people to see you.
2) Once it's out, it's totally out
The person who posted the picture did the right thing, and deleted the image right away. Still, it doesn't really affect much. It's been posted and re-posted so many times that we'll never track them all down. The Internet is unstoppable- it's too big, fast, and powerful for any one of us. It's a virus. Don't think that snuffing out an initial snafu means that you're out of the woods; you'll never be. So don't make the mistake in the first place.
3) People are impressively ignorant and judgmental
Okay; I knew this one already. But it hits home when you see them talking about YOU, and YOUR CHILD, in disparaging ways, without even knowing the situation or background.
I posted the picture on facebook for friends and family. Here's the background to it: for months, when Jack needs a new diaper, I've put him down on the changing table and given him a book because he likes to look at the pictures- it keeps him from thrashing around while I'm changing him. In just the last few days, he's started crossing his leg before I change him, assuming "old man" pose, which I just find hilarious. That's the picture I took, and why. But here's how people took it- people who don't know me from Adam: they assumed my son got himself up there, picked out a book, was fully literate, and sat there reading for minutes while I did other chores. Their guesses on his age were mostly off, and in some cases, hilarious. But that didn't stop them from pronouncing, with certainty, that he was "too old for diapers." Impressive, the knowledge they can (supposedly) gleam from a picture. Equally impressive that most people, rather than enjoying it for the humor it was intended to produce, turned it into a judgmental situation.
Our human hearts are extremely dark, and nowhere is that better displayed than the Internet. We're inherently self-centered, and that often manifests itself in judging others. "You're stupid; here's why." "I'm superior, because I don't do ______." How often do we do this? How often do I? I'll definitely think twice in the future . . .
Right. I'm off to post compromising photos of myself. Couldn't possibly hurt.
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