A Tale of Two Tours

image from here

In the last months of 2014, I want to continue reflecting on my two overseas tours and what I learned- or how I changed- due to them.  I've posted several reflections already; today's post looks at how I treated those two experiences.

My two tours- 4 years in Germany and 3 in England- were considerably different, and not only for the obvious reason that they were two different countries.  I approached them much differently.  In Germany, I focused on breadth of experience; in the UK, it was depth.  Both are explained more below.

Breadth (Germany)

Germany was my first tour.  My wife and I were childless for 2.5 years of it, and with daughter for the remaining 1.5 years.  It was our first time living overseas, and we wanted to see as much of the continent as possible.  And travel we did!  We saw 20+ countries in 4 years, and did what we could to sample the culture, food, and sights of many places.  As you'd expect, the bulk of our traveling occurred before the birth of our child, but we did a bit after, too.

Breadth is nice, but it did come at a price: we never got as familiar with German culture as we would have liked.  We wanted to improve our German, and the goal was fluency; we achieved only a mild level of comfort.  We saw a lot of Germany, but (other than Berlin) saw nothing in the north or east of the country.  We learned a little about the culture and concerns of the local area, but not enough to truly feel engaged in the community.  In short, we sampled, and loved it, but it was not without cost- we never achieved that deep intimacy, and felt we were on the outside looking in.

Depth (England)

England was my second tour.  We had one child for 1 year of it, and 2 for the remaining 2 years.  With two young children in the nest, and being geographically more isolated, we knew we wouldn't travel as far and wide as we did in Deutschland.  So, we decided to focus on depth.  We stayed on-island the entire time (save a trip or two back to the USA), and saw as much as we could of Britain (England, Scotland, and Wales).  I created a list of sites, their distance from our home, and rated each one once seen.  I made a British Reading List (discussed here, here, here, and here), and read a ton of books by British authors (or about British history).  We were more engaged in the culture (the relative lack of language barrier helped).  It was Britain all the way, all the time.

Depth is nice, but it too had its price: we never got off-island.  I wish we could have seen Ireland, Scandinavia, Spain, and other places we missed, but two little kids made such things logistically difficult (not to mention expensive and exhausting).  There was another consequence: I fell in love with Britain.  Not that it doesn't have its problems- the weather, healthcare, and housing quality could be infuriating at times- but being so focused on one region in all aspects for so long gives one a sense of ownership and intimacy.  Arguably, I know Britain better than my home country, and probably better than many British folks.

Which is better?

An impossible question to answer.  I'm glad we did it the way we did, and wouldn't change much.  Breadth, for Germany, made sense due to our station in life and geographic location.  Depth, for England, made sense due to the same.  If I had to choose one, though, I'd probably say the latter.  As I've returned to the States, I find it telling that I've now made an American Reading List, and American Travel List, and other things to mimic what I had in the UK.  It makes me believe that, deep down, I prefer to be more rooted in one place than hop around all the time.  Each has its pros and cons . . . but I guess I like swimming in the deep end.